- Holly Allene : Is trying to be a good little girl! Santa's comin to town! Go
- I am looking forward to Flight Attendant training in a few months!! And thankful to the the Lord for His goodness... Go
- Is home from work and taking it easy! BABY it's COLLLLD outside! ;) Go
Psalm 42:11
Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.
About two years ago almost exactly I went through a difficult journey. Though different in many ways some ways not, I have once again gone through the same journey. It was hard for me. The second one has been harder. During this time I drew close to the Lord. He was faithful to lead me through. I got through. I saw the light at the end of the tunnel and thanked the Lord He lead me safely all the way. I thanked Him for His faithfulness at the end. I spoke to girls about my experiences in this time of blind trust in the Lord and how good He was to lead me. In my quiet times with Jesus I told Him “Lord don’t ever allow that to happen to me again.” I was for sure He heard me! And like I had asked He being the protector that He is would never allow it again…. He did.
At first I wanted to ask why. He had allowed something so beautiful, something I was so sure of and would just to take all the peace away. I was upset. I asked God why. I wondered why He would allow something that hurts me so much and something I asked Him not to allow, ever again? ( I know I have nerve) I wondered at His plans. I wondered if all the times I thought I heard His voice I really hadn’t?
This past week I have cried. I have wept. I have cried so many tears I didn’t think I could cry anymore even if I tried. I would go places and almost complete strangers would tell me my eyes looked sad! Going to bed with a horrible headache to wake with the same one. Of course satan used this time to come at me. I felt like the enemy of my soul was knocking on my door, he was whispering to me, “God let you down! He wasn’t good to you…. Don’t trust Him….”
In the face of these thoughts and these hard times I want you to know that I have once again willed myself to Jesus. I have once again taken refuge in His arms. I will trust His plans for me. I always will. I know they are good. It’s so hard not to see the path in front of you, isn’t it? It’s hard not to know what’s ahead. One thing I have learned from this is that I have no idea what God’s plans are! I have no idea what He is doing my life or yours! But I do know we still need to trust Him. I choose to trust. I like it better this way. This way I will keep my eyes on His face, not the path ahead.
It’s hard to trust Him! But I know and already have had the experience of trusting Him and finding joy and peace and most of all finding Him faithful! I must make the choice to rest and trust His care. I know His paths and His ways are good. And one day I will see the point of the storms, the tears, the deep pain, the sleepless nights, the headaches… and those who sow in tears will reap joy! This is for sure… I am already at peace with what He is doing becuase I know He is good! I am happy in Him.
6 Comments
I love you my friend, and even more, Jesus loves you with His ALL! He is with you through this very hard valley, but I pray He brings you out soon. May He comfort and restore you. May you sense His presence today.
Comment by Jennifer Lavin on May 25th, 2008 @ 5:34 amGo back to the earliest posts…a dying man leaving his family in this dim world who has much to say of a good King behind a frowning Providence. It has brought me some perspective and comfort, maybe you too can draw a little from it.
I’ve felt sting too, but I’d take it again in a heartbeat because it makes my Jesus so beautiful - “I count it all loss…”
Be blessed today.
Comment by Josiah on May 25th, 2008 @ 12:14 pmThank you very much for that encouragement, Holly.
Comment by Christy Matteson on May 26th, 2008 @ 8:51 pmThanks for all the encouragement that you put out on your site.
Comment by Christy Matteson on May 26th, 2008 @ 8:54 pmI know I don’t know you… this early morning, I happened upon your site… or rather, God sent me here ~
My heart goes out to you. Victory in times of suffering comes only from Jesus and I know you believe that with all your heart… though that doesn’t make the pain.or hurt. go away in difficult situations.
I have just posted on my site this am on something I thought might encourage you as it has been to me ~ if the Lord leads you, drop by
http://www.xanga.com/resolved2worship
blessings and love from a sister in Christ,
Alyssa
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Hi Holly,
I am so sorry to read of this hard time you’ve been going through, and I just wanted to encourage you in your resolve to trust in God and His goodness.
Recently I’ve had the joy of being able to look back over past hurts and past events that seemed to make no sense at the time, and see the way that the Lord has used these circumstances for His glory and for my good. I’ve seen first-hand the way He turns hard things around and brings goodness and purpose.
I hope this verse encourages you:
And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose – Romans 8:28.
May Jesus be close to you right now.
Comment by Birgit on May 25th, 2008 @ 3:07 amGod bless,
Birgit.