What does it mean to forgive someone? Here are three among many other things it means when I say “I forgive you.”
– I will not bring up that in my mind and dwell on it.
– I will not bring up that sin to you again.
– I will not bring up that sin to others.
If you bring up someone’s sin against them in your heart, to them, or to others, it shows that you have not fully forgiven them.
The Scripture says that Satan is the accuser of the brethren. (Revelation 12:10) Before the throne of God He always calls for the death penalty—and he is right. Our sin is lethal and we deserve to die. Sin always leads to death. But, praise be unto God, we not only have an accuser, but we have an Advocate. Not only do we have a prosecutor, calling for the death penalty, we have an advocate, a righteous advocate who has already paid the death penalty and that Advocate—our lawyer who represents up before the Just Judge of the Universe the the only begotten and beloved Son of the Judge.
When I think about that I then see how bringing up someone’s sin against them in my heart, or to them, or to others, is doing the devil’s work. When I bring up sin that I say I have forgiven I am not on the side of the Advocate. I am on the side of the accuser. When I remind people of their past and forgiven sin, I am doing the Devil’s work. I’m operating as if I am on his side. You don’t want to work for the Devil. He has a very dismal future.
Forgivness in Marriage
Given the intimacy and the duration of a marriage relationship much forgiveness will be needed. When you live with someone you sin against them. They sin against you. The health of the relationship is going to be effected by how you deal with those injuries.
That is way Paul was inspired by the Spirit to remind husbands to love their wives and to see to it that they don’t allow the relationship to be poisoned by bitterness.
Colossians 3:16 says this: “Husbands, love your wives and don’t be bitter against them.”
When you find yourself bringing up your wife’s past sins against her in your mind or in your conversation, beware. Working within your spirit is the poison of bitterness and it is a deadly poison. Bitterness is a deadly poison and it is sinful.
Do you want your spouse to bring up your past sins–sins for which you have asked forgiveness? Who does? So don’t ever bring up your spouses’ sin against them. God can strengthen you to do this. His mercy toward us is new every morning, so our mercy toward them should be new every day, too.
Ken Pierpont
Bair Lake Bible Camp
Jones, Michigan
April 30, 2016
