Self, Selfishness, Self-forgetfulness, and Sin

I’ve been doing some thinking and reading on self, self-awareness, self-interest and sin.

1—Selfishness is Sinful, Dangerous, Demonic, Deadly.

“Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.” (Philippians 2:3, ESV)

“But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.” (James 3:14–16, ESV)

“But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.” (2 Timothy 3:1–5, ESV)

2—Self-Interest, Self-Awareness, Self-Defense Are Not Necessarily Sinful.

Wesley Gant, (Values and Capatilism) wrote: “It is self-interest that motivates us to get up and go to work, tend to our home, care for our children, seek education and follow doctors’ orders. The natural desire and core motive of human action is simply to better one’s condition.”

—Lewis quote from Weight of Glory. “It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at sea. We are far too easily-pleased.”  – C. S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory

—Piper argues the same in the Dangerous Duty of Delight and in Desiring God.

—There are many Scriptures on legitimate self-interest. “For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and the gospel’s will save it. For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world and forfeit his soul?” (Mark 8:35–36, ESV)

—Jesus himself had legitimate self-interest (Hebrews 12:2)

—Jesus own personal will was to avoid suffering but he chose God’s will instead of his own selfish will… “saying, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.”” (Luke 22:42, ESV)

“For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.” (Romans 12:3, ESV)

There is a difference between legitimate self-interest and sinful self-will.

3—Self-Deception is a Very Real Possibility—Beware that when you consider that self-awareness and self-interest are not sinful, they can be very deceptive.

John Bloom wrote: “We will have to fight against selfish ambition as long as we live in this fallen state because it’s right at the core of our fallen nature. Our sinful desire to be like God (Genesis 3:5) and pursue others’ worship. We don’t need to feign shock when we see it in ourselves (as if we’re surprised that we’re selfish!) and, like Jesus, we should be patient when we see it in others. Looking away from ourselves to Jesus is the key to walking in joyful freedom from selfish ambition. Because God designed us to be satisfied with Jesus’s glory, not our own.”

How Ought I to Think About Myself?

“For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.” (Romans 12:3, ESV)

Try not to think about yourself. Try to forget yourself. Can you? I don’t think so. Our spiritual health and emotional well-being do not depend on being self-forgetful or selfless… but on thinking soberly, thinking thoughtfully, thinking the right way about our selves.

What is the place of self-defense? What of self-esteem? What of self-awareness? Are these natural, normal and health or are they sinful and wicked and dangerous and deadly?

“You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” (Psalm 16:11, ESV)

Self-preservation

Self-defense

Self-concern

Self-interest

““Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”” (Ephesians 6:2–3, ESV)

One writer has suggested that we don’t use the term deny yourself, but that we think about it in terms of discipline—we discipline ourselves.

Jesus motive in dying on the cross—or one of them, was joy. “looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.” (Hebrews 12:2, ESV)

The Sin of Selfishness:

“Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.” (Philippians 2:3, ESV)

“But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.” (James 3:14–16, ESV)

“But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.” (2 Timothy 3:1–5, ESV)

Legitimate Self-Interest in Jesus: when he died on the cross it was for the “….joy that was set before him…”

Jesus own personal will was to avoid suffering but he chose God’s will instead of his own selfish will… “saying, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.”” (Luke 22:42, ESV)

Sometimes well-meaning Christian teachers and devotional writers condemn all self-interest. But not all self-interest is sinful. Some holiness teachers write and speak about being free from sin and consider and additional level of sanctification and they call that being free from self. There are passages that, when they are not rightly understood, seem to imply this. Deny yourself, take up your cross, etc. But the same Jesus who said “deny yourself” appealed regularly to self-interest so he must not have meant to teach that all self-interest was sinful. It is willful illegitimate self-interest that Jesus was addressing when he said “Deny yourself.”

Another way of putting it would be to say, “Deny your sinful self-will, put to death your demand to be happy on your own sinful terms and seek genuine happiness my way.”

Read the following verses and notice how often self-interest is mentioned as legitimate.

“And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands, for my name’s sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life.” (Matthew 19:29, ESV)

““For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16, ESV)

“Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life; whoever does not obey the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God remains on him.” (John 3:36, ESV)

“but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”” (John 4:14, ESV)

“Do not work for the food that perishes, but for the food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give to you. For on him God the Father has set his seal.”” (John 6:27, ESV)

“For this is the will of my Father, that everyone who looks on the Son and believes in him should have eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day.”” (John 6:40, ESV)

“I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand.” (John 10:28, ESV)

“Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.” (John 12:25, ESV)

“But because of your hard and impenitent heart you are storing up wrath for yourself on the day of wrath when God’s righteous judgment will be revealed. He will render to each one according to his works: to those who by patience in well-doing seek for glory and honor and immortality, he will give eternal life;” (Romans 2:5–7, ESV)

“And when the Gentiles heard this, they began rejoicing and glorifying the word of the Lord, and as many as were appointed to eternal life believed.” (Acts 13:48, ESV)

“For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.” (Galatians 6:8, ESV)

“in hope of eternal life, which God, who never lies, promised before the ages began” (Titus 1:2, ESV)

“But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life.” (1 Timothy 1:16, ESV)

“And this is the testimony, that God gave us eternal life, and this life is in his Son.” (1 John 5:11, ESV)

Healthy Self-Interest  vs. Rebellious Self-Will

The Bible does not, and Jesus did not condemn legitimate self-interest. Jesus assumes that a part of being human is having healthy, normal, natural self-interest. It is self-will or rebellious self-interest that the Scripture condemn. You can not be human, you can not be alive and not have an interest in your own good, in your own emotional and physical needs. To suggest otherwise, ironically, can lead only to a morbid and unhealthy kind of self-assessment and self-interest.

Jesus assumed you would have a legitimate interest in rewards, in happiness, in life. What he warned against was trying to have those legitimate needs met in a way that is contrary to his law and to his will. This is self-will, rebellious self-interest.

To desire love is not wrong, it is altogether norma and healthy. To appreciate encouraging words of affirmation is not wrong, it is normal and natural and healthy. Jesus never taught otherwise—did not hint otherwise. When in our desire for affirmation or love we are tempted to violate God’s law then we are deluded and this is the kind of self-interest the Bible warns against.

Here is an example. Do you want to be blessed? Happy? Yes, of course. This is healthy and normal and natural and human. Imagine you being to think, “To be happy I need to get people to give things to be and I need to get people to serve me.” This would be contrary to the teaching of Jesus. Jesus expects us to want blessing. He knows that it is human to desire happiness, but He is quoted in Acts as saying, “It is more blessed—happier—to give than it is to receive.” If I insist that the way of happiness is in getting people to give to me and serve me it is not my desire to be happy that is corrupted. It my self-will, my desire to happy in a way that God forbids that is corrupted.

Do Not Deceive Yourself

Having defended self-interest we have to give a caveat a warning. It is easy to deceive yourself and to assume that your self-interest is wholesome and legitimate when, in fact, it is not.

Note that it is expected that we will look on our own interests, but we are not to ignore the interests of others:

“Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” (Philippians 2:4, ESV)

“For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and the gospel’s will save it. For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world and forfeit his soul?” (Mark 8:35–36, ESV)