When The Church You Love Hurts the Women You Love

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  1. I always thought I forgave years ago and one night at Lake Ann I realized I was hanging onto unforgiveness. It was so freeing.
    I left home 575 miles from my nearest relative. I had $1.25. My neighbor I’d only known for two weeks asked me how much it would cost me for gas. Back then I told her $14. She gave me $15. She was the first one I paid back when I got some money. The decision to leave was I had the car that day. He was buying a gun that weekend. You think oh my that was a real good reason to leave. That was the last straw but truthfully I was afraid I’d shoot him. That I wouldn’t have been able to live with. I could live with people asking how I got my big blue circle under my knee and me not saying a word. I didn’t know what to say. All this time the Lord walked right beside me.
    I’m married now and we celebrated 52 years.

  2. Evelyn; I didn’t know this. It breaks my heart and makes me have great respect for you. I’m so glad the Lord took care of you and provided for you when you fled abuse. Thanks for telling a bit of the story here. We love you.

    A few days ago we passed the post office in Hinsdale, Illinois where I mailed the first copy of my first book–that was mailed to you.

    Bless you, today Evelyn.

  3. Thank you a thiusand times for speaking on this issue. I was not physically abused but I was the victim of manipulation, unfaithfulness, and emotional abuse. Because of my background I didn’t even know it. I blamed myself for everything. I “submitted” to all of it. I had married a pastor’s son who was a pastor’s son, how could he be the one who was wrong?
    The support of my church family was everything. EVERYTHING. My pastor said this, from the pulpit:
    “Husbands, love your wives. This is your mission. Wives, your part is submission. This means to support his mission. If he isn’t loving you, DON’T SUPPORT IT.”

  4. Hello Anonymous;

    I’m deeply sorry for your experience. Most people just don’t realize the pain some have to quietly endure. I’m happy to hear that your church was supportive. That is not always the case. By God’s grace maybe we can raise awareness and appeal to the collective conscience of the church on the matter if abuse.